I Found Me

A volatile, abusive marriage. Loss of confidence and a sense of identity. A journey in search of redemption. Ah... the weekend - what a holy mess! What an unholy mess in fact! That weekend, I watched as Jack reeled about drunkenly and insulting friends. All veneers and facades were stripped away. He revealed to everyone the ugly side he usually saved for me. And there was nothing I could do. The cat was not just out of the bag, it had ripped its way out, yowling and tearing, nasty and vicious. There was no conceivable way to hide, diffuse or halt the raging storm. I could only watch aghast, horrified, embarrassed, and so, so sad. I was ashamed and full of sorrow for myself, and for Jack. I watched in horror as this once-charming man, staggering about, stripped away all years of my shielding, protecting, and covering up his dark side. I was beyond shame and beyond humiliated. Now, everyone knew the dark side of Jack and the secretive, weak, pitiable side of me.